The influence of a mother is often the first and most significant impact on a child’s behavior. A good upbringing is crucial, but many people only recognize the toxic environment they grew up in when they reach adulthood.
A mother who promises love and care but mistreats her child is known as a toxic mother. Often, people do not even realize that their mother is toxic until later in life.
Here are eight signs that you were raised by a toxic mother:
1.You have low self-esteem:
Toxic mothers often destroy their children’s self-esteem by comparing them to siblings or other children. You may feel worthless and insignificant because of this.
2.You always put others first:
Toxic mothers rarely consider what would make their children happy. They believe they know what is best for their children and use them to meet their own emotional needs. As a result, you may have grown up believing that you should always put others before yourself.
3.You seek validation or reassurance:
Toxic mothers make their children feel wrong or guilty. Therefore, children may stick to unhealthy relationships simply because their partner gives them compliments.
4.You feel afraid:
Toxic mothers use various tactics to control their children, including making them fearful of their life choices. If you experienced a lot of fear in your childhood about making the right choices, you may still struggle to make important decisions.
5.You believe your goals are impossible to achieve:
Toxic mothers often teach their children that their dreams, aspirations, and goals are impossible to achieve. If you have settled for a life you never wanted, it may be because you grew up with a mother who wanted to achieve her goals before yours.
6.You justify their behavior:
If you grew up believing that your parent was physically or emotionally abusive towards you because you deserved it, you may find yourself justifying their behavior as an adult. Even when someone treats you badly, you may internalize the blame without standing up for yourself.
7.You blame yourself:
If you compare your relationship with your mother to those of your friends, you may feel like you’re at fault for being born. Toxic mothers often make their children feel this way.
8.You feel guilty:
Toxic mothers often use guilt as a tool to control their children, even when they are adults. If you fail to do as they want, they will try to make you feel guilty about your actions.
If most of these signs resonate with you, it may be helpful to consider how your mother’s parenting style has affected your life and relationships. You can also find strategies to minimize the damage that your mother’s toxicity has caused.