A 48-year-old man recently shared his story on Reddit, revealing a challenging situation regarding his daughter’s wedding plans. The father, who had always encouraged his 19-year-old daughter to be an independent thinker, found himself in a dilemma when she expressed her decision not to have him walk her down the aisle.
“I’m a 48-year-old man, and my daughter has always been an independent thinker. I raised her to be independent, which I’ve always appreciated. However, we recently hit a bit of a snag,” the father began his narrative.
Upon getting engaged, the daughter insisted that her parents had no right to “give her away” as she believed she was not anyone’s property. This stance left the father feeling hurt, considering they had always treated her as an individual rather than an object.
“Her stance seems extreme to me, and despite discussions, she’s refusing to budge on the issue. I respect her choices, but I feel she’s disregarding our feelings completely. In response, I told her that if she feels that way, then I won’t be paying for her wedding,” he explained, expressing his conflicted emotions.
“I don’t want to come across as controlling or manipulative. I don’t ‘own’ her, and I also don’t owe her a fully-funded wedding. If she’s insistent on this stance, she can pay for her own wedding,” he concluded.
In an edit to his post, the father clarified that his objection was not about making the wedding about himself but rather about his daughter’s attitude. He emphasized that walking her down the aisle was a tradition symbolizing respect, pride, love, and honoring the father-daughter relationship.
Addressing comments from both sides, the father stated, “For all the YTA (You’re the Ahole) people out there, I’ve decided to give my daughter a gift in the same amount as her older sister’s wedding cost. She can use this for whatever she wants. For the NTA (Not the Ahole) people out there, thanks, most of you get it.”
He later added that his daughter agreed to find a way to include them in the wedding without involving the traditional act of “giving her away.” Despite the disagreement, the father emphasized that it wasn’t a relationship-ending event and expressed confidence in his daughter’s character, dismissing concerns about being disinvited from the wedding or cut off from potential grandkids as petty and manipulative.
