In a recent study conducted in India, it was found that 44 percent of married couples believe that engaging in fights more than once a week helps maintain open lines of communication. This finding aligns with similar studies conducted in the United States, as highlighted by William Doherty, a professor at the University of Minnesota’s Department of Family Social Science.
Let’s explore the reasons why fighting can be advantageous for your relationship:
1. Conflict signals a mature relationship.
Maturity in a relationship means avoiding personal attacks and shouting matches. Instead, mature individuals strive to find a middle ground through healthy arguments, aiming to improve their relationship.
2. Conflict indicates care.
Engaging in conflict shows that you care enough about the relationship to address hurt feelings and anger, rather than simply walking away. It signifies an active pursuit of solutions and breakthroughs that can strengthen your bond.
3. Conflict enhances communication.
Trust is a vital component of love. To build trust in your relationship, it is crucial not to remain silent. Approaching your partner with an open mind, taking responsibility for your actions, and actively listening to each other contribute to better communication. It is important to resist the temptation to be cruel or bitter, even when it may seem satisfying in the heat of the moment. This approach promotes healthier, longer-lasting relationships.
4. Conflict is indicative of a healthy relationship.
A study titled “Able Arguers,” conducted in 2012 among 976 individuals, found that couples who engage in healthy conflict are 10 times more likely to have a happy relationship compared to those who avoid difficult conversations.
5. Conflict strengthens your connection.
Minor conflicts provide opportunities for both partners to reveal their true nature and learn how to navigate differences together. Overcoming challenges as a team fosters compromise and strengthens the bond between you.
6. Conflict alleviates resentment.
If you allow your partner to believe they can have everything they want while nurturing your own growing resentment, your relationship may become unhealthy. Expressing your negative feelings and asserting your own needs helps establish equality and balance.
7. Conflict increases the likelihood of staying together.
Lack of communication can quickly lead to misunderstandings, resentments, and emotional distance. Focusing solely on your own perspective may hinder your ability to empathize with your partner, potentially driving them away. By addressing and resolving issues through conflict, you can prevent problems from escalating and increase the chances of maintaining a long-lasting relationship.
8. Conflict reveals passion.
Expressing your emotions from time to time is essential, as suppressing them can be detrimental. However, it is crucial to end any argument on a positive note, ensuring that both partners feel heard and understood.
9. Conflict saves you from boredom.
Even after years of dating the same person, you can discover new differences every day. These differences are not necessarily a negative sign but rather an opportunity for personal growth and adaptation. Embracing these variations can inject excitement into your relationship, preventing it from becoming monotonous.
It is important to note that there is a distinction between “healthy fighting” and “unhealthy fighting.” Only healthy conflict can be beneficial for your relationship. It is crucial to learn how to have constructive arguments with your partner.
Do you engage in regular conflicts with your partner? How do you navigate and find compromises? We would love to hear about your experiences.